Extremely bad day!!!

[Trudie]

Well, it is now a year since I was diagnosed.  I have had some tough times and some very good times.

Then I started to lose weight (on purpose)  .  Well guess what happened.  Losing weight gave me more energy, so I kept pushing myself.  Exercising lots.  (All the time thinking I can't possibly feel this great and have CFS)

I now know I was deluding myself.   For the last few weeks I have felt extremely dizzy and tired.  I am not sleeping well.  Did these warning signs make me slow down.  No I kept on going.

Big mistake. 

Yesterday I could not move to get out of bed to go to work.  My body just went into shut down.  My legs are in spasm my joints and muscles are very painful.

I am back at work today but limping along because I am in pain and my legs are very stiff.  Luckily we are not too busy at the moment so I can just plod along.

I plan on just recharging myself this weekend.

Sorry for the long post but I am just in shock that I could get to the state I was in yesterday.  It was terrifying.  I don't like to give in. 

[bossy]

 

I can really understand what you are feeling - its such a hard balance trying to do "enough" to give yourself the chance to stay as fit as you can within limtations and so easy to do "too much" - the problem with ME is also the post exterion malaise - which means its not till after we have done something that we feel the effects!!  and then its too late

I have been ill for many years with ME and although  I have been ill all that time I did mange to work partime but was always catching viruses etc!
 
Three years ago (before I finally went to ME clinic and got formal diagnosis) I decided that maybe I was just ill because i was getting out of shape or de -condtioned as some professionals think!- so I joined my local runnning club. I struggled from day one but really enjoyed it and although my progress was slow (I ran with a lady 15 years older than me!!) I kept on going.  After six months we started buiding the distance we ran to about 4 - 5 miles - this is when things really started to go very wrong and my health deteriorated fast - after a year running I had the biggest ME crash I have ever had - and now a year and a half on my functioning level is still terrible.


Like you I don't like to give in, but I have learnt that to some extent with ME you have to rty and live within limiations abit which I find very difficult!!

I hope you can rest up a bit and start to feel better soon.

x x

[roger]

Don't be sorry, Trudie, it's good to get this stuff off your chest.

Maybe it's best to not consider easing off and recouping as 'giving in' - it's what you need in the same way you need an aspirin or whatever for a headache.

I hope things improve for you very soon.

[Beowulf1976]

My thoughts are with you take the time to recuperate, have a really good relaxing weekend and remember to not overdo it.

[Trudie]

Thank you all for your kind words.  Just what I needed.

Tonights plan of action, after work is just to chill out have a long soak in the bath and read a book.  I think I might just have enough energy for that.

[Beowulf1976]

remember not to have the bath too hot, hot baths are a trigger for me :S

[Trudie]

 

Well I had my not too hot bath Beowolf.   I was exhausted last night and could barely walk again.  So I went to bed before 9 o'clock. 

My legs are still troubling me today and I feel exhausted. 

I am at work but luckily it is a sit down job and we are not busy.

Roll on the weekend, I am just going to rest and relax and recharge my batteries.


Have a good weekend everyone.